Say nothing

I’m on vacation with my family this week.  There are nine of us (we’ll almost, my sister and my niece arrive tonight). When I tell people that I vacation with my extended family I find their reactions interesting.

I get responses like:

“That’s wonderful! You must have a great time!” 

to

“Seriously? How do you survive THAT?”

to

“That’s nice, but I could never go on vacation with my family.”

While I always look forward to our time together, being it isn’t easy.

Nine different personalities, preferences, and communication styles being away from the comfortable routine of home and having to compromise one’s desires or wishes for the sake of the group or someone else’s preference.

On past trips, I haven’t done the best job of keeping quiet when silence would’ve been the best and most appropriate response.  I’m an extrovert. My thoughts and feelings come spilling out, falling-out, of my mouth.

Add emotions (or a cocktail) and they come out even faster.

This trip, however, I’ve been focusing on the art of saying nothing, especially when I feel like I’ve just “got to say something” because I’m;

a.) irritated

b.) think I’m right

or

c.) ready to pick a fight.

I’m human, what can I say?

Anyway, I’m working on saying nothing.

Why?

Call it sentimentality, or maybe increased emotional self-awareness. But either way, I realize that these trips, this time to create memories, won’t always be a possibility. Going on vacation like this, for whatever reason, won’t happen every year for the rest of my life.   Life will, inevitably, throw something our way which will eliminate or make these trips impossible as they currently stand. We’re already down two family members, not because they’ve passed on, but because circumstances and hurt feelings have prevented it.

It’s hard to think about that too much.

So, to make this trip as beautiful, as fun, and as calm as I want it to be, I’m working on saying nothing when I’m irritated…or would prefer we do something “my way,” or when what I would say might hurt someone else’s feelings or cause unneeded stress.

I haven’t been perfect, but I’ve been better than in year’s past and it’s made the first part of this trip much more enjoyable. For me, and for my family (I hope anyway).

Makes me wonder, what would happen if you chose to hold back what’s on your mind?

PS

It was raining when I started this blog. It looks like it’s going to stop now, so off I go, to enjoy some sun, the people around me, and a little bit of silence.

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